Dylan tells off a tea bagger
Hell hath no fury like a pissed off Dylan Harper. In this one scene episode, some vile Conservative yahoo decides to try to tell the Harper CEO what he is and is not to do, and then that person realizes that he shouldn't have messed around with Dylan or the Harper family! Scene Outside of the Harper Industries headquarters in the Back Bay area. Dylan Harper is on his way to a lunch meeting with Chris Mannington, the head of Media Relations at Harper and his co-CEO, his twin cousin, Sheila. While crossing through Copley Square, a person with sheer arrogance, comes up to the very much harried Dylan. PERSON: Excuse me, Mr. Harper. DYLAN (distracted): Sorry, have no time right now, I am going to be late for a meeting. PERSON (pressing on): You don't understand! This is the ONE meeting you HAVE to be at. DYLAN (annoyed): What are you talking about? PERSON: I am the recruiter of the Beacon Hill Tea Party and I am asking you to join. DYLAN (his distaste for Tea Party politics knows no bounds): Look, I am sorry, I have to decline. I really don't have time for this! PERSON (pleading): Sir, you are a Harper. Your family name will bring solidity to our cause. DYLAN (by now getting angry): You don't understand, Sir. I don't agree with your politics. I'm a liberal Democrat. Always have been, and always will be! PERSON: But.....you run a multi-BILLION dollar corporation. DYLAN: It is not merely a corporation; it is my FAMILY corporation. PERSON: So is the Koch Brothers. Think of the prestige! The CLOUT! The Kochs could open doors for you. DYLAN (not impressed): Like I said, no thanks. PERSON (menacingly): You WILL join this group. DYLAN (really angered now): Excuse me?! PERSON: You WILL join this group! DYLAN (shooting the person the Harper Glare): You listen to me, you little puissant! I am NOT going to join a group that goes against EVERYTHING I was ever taught in school and learned by my ancestors. The Harpers have ALWAYS been Democrats. Wealth or no, we're Democrats to the bone! And I am not going to be BULLIED by a miserable little cretin like you into joining something I do not want to join! First of all, I am absolutely AGAINST EVERYTHING the Tea Party stands for! Your aim is to cripple people who are not like you! I find that despicable! I may be wealthy, but there IS something called Noblesse Oblige. Or have you idiots seemed to forget that......or worse, not even learned it?! Second of all, I am not the person you would want to look to. I am gay, I am married to a man, the father of two adopted children, and I am not at all what your narrow-minded powers that be would want! I will NOT teach my children the venomous bile that you and your creepy kind spew on a daily basis! And THIRD of all, joining a disreputable group like yours is just completely BENEATH my dignity, not just as a Harper, but also as an American. You can take your invite to your stupid little group and toss it in the trash. Now, get the hell out of my way, and leave me alone! (Stunned, the person slaps Dylan in the face) PERSON (snobbishly): You don't ever talk down to ME in that manner! DYLAN (about to completely lose his temper): You made a HUGE mistake, Buster! You began making it, the minute you opened your big mouth! The moment you slapped me, you sealed your fate! PERSON (laughing): What the hell are you going to do to ME?! (A security guard from Harper Industries, who caught the argument, comes up, along with Sheila and Chris.) GUARD: Are you all right, Mr. Harper? DYLAN: Yes, I am fine, Rogers. Could I ask you to get this malodorous piece of dreck away from me? GUARD: With pleasure! SHEILA (worried): Are you all right, hon? DYLAN: Yes, dear. I am fine. CHRIS: Who is this idiot? DYLAN (glaring at him): A piece of nothing who was trying to manipulate me into joining a Tea Party Political group I have NO liking for. When I told him no and told him to leave me alone, this cretin slapped me in the face! SHEILA (angered): Oh, he DID that, did he? DYLAN: Yes, he did! And my face still stings to prove it. GUARD: You wish me to contact the police? DYLAN: Yes. I want this creep taken away and for him to be banned from all Harper property. GUARD: Right away, sir. PERSON (infuriated): You have no right to do this! SHEILA (angrily): And you think you have the right to slap MY cousin in the face?! I saw the whole thing, and so did Chris. There are witnesses to what you did, so I don't think your theory has any legs to stand on! PERSON (smugly): But the Tea Party is so PERFECT! CHRIS (himself angry at the injustice to Dylan): Shut up! Leave the Harpers alone! PERSON (arrogantly): Nobody asked you to talk, you damned queer! (Dylan is really mad now) DYLAN (in a voice that is as brittle as ice): You just keep digging yourself in deeper and deeper, don't you? Bad enough that you insult me, but then you go and slam one of my dearest friends. PERSON: That....that....trash is your FRIEND?! DYLAN (his eyes spitting fire as he defends Chris): The only trash I see is the person I am yelling at, you cretin! Let me tell you something, Christopher Mannington is 100 times the man that you will EVER be! I would much prefer HIS company than to be around a bully like you! PERSON: My party is a lot better than yours! DYLAN: Shut up! Your party means NOTHING to me! I cannot tell you what to believe, and I am also accorded that same respect, am I not? PERSON: NO! Not when you are talking with someone who is your superior! DYLAN (his voice and manners absolutely FURIOUS): You listen to me! And I am telling you one last time! I want NOTHING to do with your organization! I refuse to speak to you and your kind one second MORE! I am almost late for a meeting with my friend, Christopher, and I will NOT have my time wasted. PERSON: But........but........but DYLAN: Now, you get to stepping and I don't want you ANYWHERE around my company ever again! If I see you around ANY of the Harper properties, I will have you taken into custody! You get me?! PERSON: You cannot stop my freedom of speech! DYLAN (spitting in rage): You are trying my patience, little man! (The person takes a swing at Dylan! Chris and Sheila yank him out of the way. The guard grabs the person and has him detained for the police, who come over to the scene. The person is taken away in a squad car, screaming and yelling and raging.) OFFICER: Are you all right, Mr. Harper? DYLAN: Yes, I am fine. OFFICER: That clown is one brick shy of a load. SHEILA: Yes, he is. Thank you, Officer Murphy. MURPHY: You're quite welcome, Ms. Watkins. DYLAN: You need my statement? MURPHY: You can fax it to me. DYLAN: Thank you. (Murphy sets off for the nearby Library, where he came from. Sheila looks at Dylan.) SHEILA (concerned): Are you all right? DYLAN: Yes, honey, I am fine. SHEILA (relieved): OK. I was worried. DYLAN: You don't worry, honey. We've both had heart scares. I was more scared that you were going to have another heart episode. SHEILA (the love for her cousin evident): Thank you for being concerned, dearest. But I am fine. That guy slapped you and then nearly took a swing at you. Who was that clown? DYLAN: Some idiot who wanted me to join his little idiot group. SHEILA: You didn't join it, did you? DYLAN: No, honey. I wouldn't join his group for ANYTHING! I told him where he could take his little invite and also exactly where to put it! SHEILA (grinning): Good! I am glad. Shall we go have our lunch meeting? CHRIS: Yes, I am famished. DYLAN: So am I. Crushing a clown like that is hungry work! (The three laugh, and they head off to the Top of the Tower at the nearby Prudential Tower. The scene fades) Category:Episodes Category:Episodes featuring Dylan and Sheila Category:Hall of Fame Episodes